Mid-Life Crisis?

During a 47 minute hammerfest that included 4 minutes of Tabata Intervals on a stationary bike, I started thinking - deeply thinking (which I often do during these times of suffering). I thought; here I sit in a gym full of middle-aged to elderly women and men and I realized that I'm now one of them! When did I transition and cross over into being a middle-aged guy trying to hang on to good health? What happened to the twenty-something kid that used to play college basketball and not have a care in the world? I don't remember my mind ever transitioning into middle-agedom, but my body certainly has! In fact, I still think of myself as being in my late twenty's - probably to a fault.

That got me thinking even more. Here I sit on a stationary bike at 9:00 am on a Tuesday - sweating, jobless, sleeping on a friend's couch, children in another state, wondering and praying about what's around the corner. I realized that this is not what I had planned for my life at 43 years old! This was not the blueprint I had laid out to follow. My focus had gone from being a professional in an industry that I loved and grew up with, to figuring out how to survive and re-invent myself - at age 43! This was not the plan I had sketched out! Then it dawned on me! I'm not alone in this! Maybe this is the epitome of what people refer to as a mid-life crisis. Maybe that's the very definition! Could it be that millions of men have these goals and plans in the backs of their mind and it inevitably never quite comes to fruition the way they planned it? That's certainly me. Perhaps I've found the key to what a midlife crisis is! Self realization that life throws you pitches that you just can't hit. Maybe once we've realized this and accepted it for what it is, we can move on and truly fall into what it is that we are. Not necessarily a re-invention at middle life, but a divine intervention in succumbing to what we are truly meant to be!

Psalm 138

Sunday Training Day

I'm writing this on Monday night because I haven't had a chance to upload any of the blogging due to work schedule. Work has been crazy in a good way. It's kept me busy!

Sunday was a day of some serious training after a tough day of riding on Saturday. It was nice to be outside during some good weather for a change. Now if the weather would just stick for a while so the outdoor training could be more consistent.

The ride was a 2.5 hour 45 mile ride that literally kicked my tail due to the cold and wind. The Sunday swim workout/thrashing was as follows:

20 Minute Warm Up
8 x 75 fins 1:30, 1:45, 2:00
25 tarzan swim
25 fly kick
25 free swim breathing every 5

Group 2, 31 x 100
6 x 100 @ 2:00
8 x 100 @ 1:55
4 x 100 @ 1:50
3 x 100 @ 1:45
8 x 100 @ 1:40
2 x 100 @ 1:35

Yesterday's TWO Workouts!

Yesterday was my day to meet my coach Richard Baker (@triswami) in the morning for a workout. He had originally planned for us to do an outdoor workout on the bikes that would include hill repeats. However, that didn't come to fruition because of the weather being bad. So his plan B was to do any indoor cycling trainer session that was a bit over an hour that would stay consistently in that zone 2 range. I have to say, I continue to learn and enjoy it as the old Triswami knows what he's doing and talking about. It's quite enjoyable learning the in's and out's of the sport and pushing my body to limits I previously didn't know I had.

Later that evening (after work, of course), I went to triathlon swim class where the class seemed a bit less crowded than usual. It looked like we only had about 60-70 participants rather than 100! At any rate, our coach Ashley showed no mercy on the feeble! It was a training session that left me beat to the point that I felt a little sick and going to bed at 9:00. That's usually unheard of for a creative night owl like myself.

It was a productive training day filled with other ups and downs. The Lord was heavily dealing with me yesterday. I count that a blessing as He's continuously letting me know that He won't let me get away. For that, I'm thankful!

Here's what yesterday's swim workout consisted of:

20 Minute Warm Up
500 Kick/ Drill by 50's with fins (work On streamlining past 3rd line off every wall)

8x50 pull @ :55
2x200 negative split @ 3:00, 3:20
4x100 fast @ 1:30, 1:40

300 pull smooth 6:00
2x150 negative split @ 2:10, 2:30
3x100 fast @ 1:30, 1:40

200 pull smooth 4:00
2x100 negative split @ 1:30, 1:40
2x100 fast @ 1:30, 1:40

100 pull smooth 2:00
1x100 negative split @ 2:00
1x100 all out FAST!!
100 easy recovery

100 cool down

Troy's First Ride of '09

Today was a monumental day in that Troy took his first training ride since our last triathlon back in October. It's been almost 5 months for him and as would be expected, he was out of shape but ready to back in to it. The weather was amazing and warranted the attitude of wanting to get out and be active. Troy caught the bug. . . thankfully. He's getting that itch again to get back into a regular regimen. It's been a week since he has gotten back on a good healthy weight losing diet, and if he stays with it along with exercise, he'll drop weight quick.

After our short easy zone 2 (for all you triathletes) ride, I quickly hustled home to put away my bike and head to swim practice for a butt kicking session that ended up being about 3000 meters of sheer hell! Toward the end of practice, I started battling cramps in my feet which is due from fatigue and lack of hydration.

At any rate, practice was good and it was great to be back out on the bike with my partner/brother Troy.

Today was a good day.

The Car Giveaway

Today, I woke up intending to do some riding on the bike. However, after sleeping in until almost 10:00 am (which I didn't mean to do), the weather forced me to change my plans. It was too cold this morning to ride so I postponed it until the afternoon - hoping to fit it in once it warmed up.

Also, today was the day that Troy and I decided to give the twins their new/used car for their 16th birthday. It's a Ford Taurus that used to be owned by our Grandmother Johnson. So the afternoon was spent cleaning and getting the car in tip-top shape. Troy and his wife Stacie were selfless, generous, and loving enough to give me their car after having it transferred into my name in order to give it to the girls for their sweet sixteen. In the phase of life that I'm in, and for the unconditional love that they have for their nieces, Troy and Stacie showed me their continued Christ-like love in their generosity to my sweet girls. I will never be able to express my gratitude to them and to the Lord for always being faithful in His provision for me and my family.

Throughout this whole life-changing journey that I've been on, I can now look back and see just how the Lord has continually had me in His loving hands and watched over my every move. I'm still learning to totally and completely put all of my faith in Him in every aspect of my life. However, it's this journey that He seems to be using to draw me closer to Him.

On a much more unimportant note, I DID get in an intense 45 minute bike training session in this afternoon before all of the "reindeer games" started. It was nice to be out with no music, no other riders, and just my thoughts and prayers. The weather was a little on the cold side, but overall it was nice to be back out on the road. I rode just under 15 miles and if you'd like to check the stats, click here.

Tomorrow is swim practice at the complex. I'd like to get in a short ride as well, but that may be wishful thinking with church involved.

Today was a great day! I'm a blessed man and a happy and proud father!

100k Group Ride

Okay, so it's been about a week since my last post here. It's been because I've been so busy with work, kids, training schedule, etc. I guess life is just getting in the way of my posting.

At any rate, I'm typing this blog while sitting on my back deck enjoying the perfect 74 degree sunny weather. I wasn't so lucky this morning. This morning the temp was mid 50's, overcast, and a slight mist. Not exactly perfect biking weather. By the time I had finished the ride, my bike and I were completely covered in dirt and water from the roads - but I digress.

I arrived at the meeting launch spot well before the 7:15 depart time. I wanted to make sure that I had everything in place and was not feeling rushed. Once we got going (myself and 8 other stud riders), I immediately realized that these guys weren't your average weekend warrior-type riders. These guys are vastly experienced in riding and/or many triathlons. I then knew I was in for a long day and I was out of my league. However, I felt good and stayed well within the pack. I went on relatively holding my own for the first two hours until we got to an unrelenting monster hill. Needless to say, I hit the wall. It was everything I could to to hang on until eventually I got dropped. Yes, I got dropped! It was humbling to say the least but a learning experience that I'm sure I'll draw from down the road. My coach (and quickly becoming a good friend), Richard Baker in all of his gregariousness, was kind enough to turn around, come back, and ride the last hour of the ride with me. That truly meant a lot to me and told me a ton about his character. He didn't have to do that. I could've made it back on my own, but he decided to use that time as teaching tool and I was accepting and grateful. We finally made it back and I was never so happy to see my car in the distance. However, I had a great time and truly learned a ton from these experienced guys that allowed a "newbie" to tag along. Thanks guys!

I certainly know now that I have a long way to go to where I want to be and today was an indicator toward that. I also know some areas that I can improve on and that also encourages me. I'm always up for growth.

Lastly in case you're wondering, my coach is not just a coach (in the traditional sense). He's a seriously competitive athlete and I have a long way to go before I ever get close to his level. One can certainly hope!

Season's First Ride

First outdoor ride of the new year, and even though it was a bit on the chilly side, it was great to be back in the saddle! I needed to have a few more layers on and that was evident within the first 5 minutes I was out on the road. Though having to tough it out, it was a great beginning ride and I had a great time alone conversing with the Lord. We had a nice "chat" about some personal concerns that have been weighing heavy on my mind. The ride and the prayer time proved to be a big stress relief for some reason. It's just like I remembered the last time I rode outside. What a great time it was and it's proved to be an essential growth tool for me. It keeps me centered, grounded, and spiritually focused. Something I've needed to be for years.

This weekend is supposed to be a nice one weather-wise and I'm hoping to be able to get some more quality training in tomorrow (Sunday) after church of course.

Painting in the Cold

Today, the temperature at 10:00 AM was 11 degrees. Certainly not conducive to training outside. Plus, I had to be at the office literally all day painting the new studio that I'm relocating my equipment to. I'm tremendously thankful but greatly tired.

I haven't had a chance to train in 2 days due to schedule and the extreme cold. I'm so ready for the weather to be good and warm. I hate this crap! We're in the middle of a cold front and the weather is supposed to be in the single digits again tomorrow so it looks as though I'm going to have to do some indoor spinning on the bike. Oh well. Man, am I ready to get out and do some more running! Spring, please hurry!

A Boring Sunday Spin

Nothing much to report training-wise outside of just getting in a pretty good 60 minute stationary spin indoors. It was very uneventful and super boring! Thank God for music! I would've wanted to die if I'd had nothing.

Still trying to be diligent about my training and I'm still very connected to the spiritual aspect of the mental escape. I, once again, found myself in a different mental state once I was well into the indoor spin. It simply amazes me what happens mentally, spiritually, emotionally, etc. Maybe there's something chemical that happens within the body. I DO know that major amounts of endorphins are released and that may have something to do with it. I don't really know, but it IS fascinating and I look forward to my "spiritual" time alone.

I think Troy is getting back to a place where he's wanting to jump back in, but I'm not sure. He's expressed interest and I'm hoping that he is wanting to again get going - for none other than his personal health. He'll be back. I know it and I can feel it. It just has to be on his timing and willingness.

Draw Me Close

It was a quiet, cold, and dreary morning. Obviously, not the type of weather to be getting outside to train in. Therefore, I decided to get in an hour spin on the incumbent bike. Not exactly my idea of exciting training. At any rate, I kept things quiet and low-key. No tv, no training partner, no kids. Just me, my bike, and some music through my headphones to do some escaping. Once again, I found my self drifting to that spiritual zone. The one where God makes himself one step short of visible. I've come to realize this is a very real and cherished thing for me. It's my one-on-one time with my Lord. It's my prayer closet per se'.

With all that's going on in my life, the lives around me, and our society in general, it's easy to get caught up in the problems of self. The Lord spoke to me again about being more giving to other, more selfless, and more aware of others' concerns. This is where I want to go and be. So, as I'm listening to my worship music while I'm spinning and pouring sweat, the Lord (once again) speaks to me through a song that comes on. This was my message:

Draw Me Close
Draw me close to you never let me go
I lay it all down again to hear you say that I'm your friend
You are my desire no one else will do
'cause no one else can take your place
To feel the warmth of your embrace
Help me find the way bring me back to you

Chorus:
You're all I want, you're all I've ever needed
You're all I want help me know you are near

I feel that this is all that God asks and longs for from us. Continuous and personal fellowship with Him. I'm so grotesquely human and I have such a long way to go!

Indoor Cycling

Today was a rather hectic day. I woke up with the twins this morning to take them to school instead of the standard 4:30 a.m. start for swim practice. They had to stay up late to finish a school project. After taking them to school, I immediately had to go back to the house to do a thorough cleaning for a showing at 10:00 a.m. I can only pray and hope! Anyway, in a nutshell, I didn't get to get in a workout. Our training schedule called for a 40 minute spin with some standard weight training. As you can see, I got in the spinning at home around 7:00 p.m. and it was a pretty good workout. I also got some sit ups and push ups to go along with.

Troy has still yet to get started on our program and I'm feeling that he's rather stressed over work, life in general, and the fact that he has another one on the way in about 9 months! Right now is the perfect time for him to be digging in physically in order to relieve that stress that'll build up and get an unhealthy hold of him. I'm a bit worried about him but don't want to press any issue at this point. He'll get it going and he'll realize it's a much better coping mechanism.

Hang in there T!

A Cold Day's Ride

Doing a yoga workout is certainly no joke! I knew it would be tough and really good for you, but I never realized that it would make me this sore from doing slow moving body movements! I thought, even with a month training layoff, I was in pretty decent shape and able to do just about any workout without much trouble. Well yoga is a different story. It's stretching, slow movements, breathing, and concentration - and it's tough! I can see it being a great addition to the triathlon training that Troy and I are embarking on for next season.

I did a 45 minute yoga workout yesterday and this morning woke up extremely sore. . . again! Because of the soreness and lactic acid build up in my legs, I decided to go for a short 11 mile bike ride. It was my first one in a month, and it was a little tough but enjoyable. The tough part was due to me being out of cycling shape and the bitter cold. I hate riding in the cold! However, it was good for me and I'm glad that I did it. It was one of those days that I didn't feel like doing anything and had to force myself to be active outside. It's certainly a good feeling once you're done.

Attached is the link to the route that I took.
Today's cold ride!

Lance in the Wind Tunnel

Lance Armstrong in the Wind Tunnel

Posted to Bicycling by CM on November 18, 2008

Click to Play | View Details

No Training for the Weary

Today is Thursday the 13th. It should be a really good day for me since my favorite number is 13! However, it's rainy, overcast, gloomy, and that makes for kind or a blah day. I'm ending week 2 of not really being diligent in my workouts. Even though it's been nice not to have all the exertion expended, I find that I thoroughly miss the training, the responsibility that goes along with it, and of course the spiritual aspect. I need to get back out there because I feel like I'm cheating the Lord out of our "friendship" time together. I'm looking forward to after Thanksgiving moving into a regularly scheduled routine. It'll be good for me physically, stress-wise, and most importantly spiritually. I've been battling with some depression of late and I think it's attributed to the fact that I haven't been out there beating the pavement. However, I will and I'm planning on getting in some sort of workout this weekend just to keep my body used to the muscle memory.

I miss Troy and my rides. I miss our workouts. And I miss the pain that my body goes through to become better. I think of that as a metaphor to what the Lord is allowing me to go through currently. I'm enduring a lot of pain to be stronger in the end and that's what He's shown me throughout this triathlon journey.

Lance Armstrong Interview at Web 2.0 Summit

Very interesting and educational interview. The most open and laid back interview that I've ever seen Lance give. I'm greatly anticipating his comeback to pro racing. I believe it'll be great for the sport.

Today's Update from Troy

Well, we DID get the ride in today around 3:30. How about this? We tried a variation of a mid-distance route and it was PERFECT! 18 miles and we did it in 1 hr and 1 minute (and that included a TON of stops behind a school bus). The weather was perfect. It was low 70’s and crystal clear with a nice breeze blowing. Todd and I had a very nice and enjoyable ride. I feel like we have our best talks about Jesus and what He is doing in our lives on days like this. It seems that when we get “deep” on stuff, that the moments fly by and the miles just rack up and it’s over before you know it. I’ll tell you, my brother is an AMAZING creation. The stuff that cripples us mere mortals is stuff that he just sails right through. For example, I don’t think he’s aware that steep hills are difficult on a bike and that slowing down is a natural occurrence. Oh well, be that as it may, I DO feel his pushing me has improved me greatly both physically AND spiritually (which is more important anyway – and we would BOTH say so without hesitating). I never dreamed that when we made ourselves accountable to each other back in April that we would be this transformed in so many ways 5 months later. God is steering our collective ship. I absolutely LOVE the view from His “boat” too! Give it a try if you haven’t gotten on board yet.