The Journey

We complain about the cross we bear but don't realize

It is preparing us for the dip in the road that God can see and we can't.

God is going to shift things around for you

and let things work in your favor.

I believe this to be true and I confess that I have faith that God sees all, knows all, and IS all. I believe that He knows me and knows my future and has some incredible things in store! Keep praying for me.

Now off to train!

The Coming Days

At the time that I'm writing this, I currently sit in the public library where things are quiet, I can be online and check email, and just think. I'm sitting at my usual table in a corner next to a floor to ceiling length window where I can view the outside and feel somewhat connected to it. There's an unusual amount of snow on the ground that brightens up everything outside. It's calm, still, and quiet out there. Yet, there's still the movement and motion of the birds and squirrels going about their daily business of looking for food as if there were no change in the landscape.

I'll be honest, I sit here quietly very unnerved. I know in whom I belong and I know where my strength comes from. As I get older, I also have realized that my faith continues to grow. I need to continue to draw from that more than ever right now! I feel, in life, God allows us to go through and endure certain things that we may not currently understand but need to have faith in knowing that we are in His hands and under His timing. That's the tough part and that's where I currently reside. I'm in a professional transitional state and I need the Lord to show up and intervene in a mighty way - and I know that He will! I just have to trust in His will and timing.

I've had so many blessing throughout my life and I've had so many people that God has brought my way to help me tremendously. I know He won't let me go and I know that He has something just around the corner in order to use me for His will. I'm ready, I'm willing, and I'm able! I just want to go where He is already working.

Pray for me and the coming days.

Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever.
(Ephesians 3:20-21)

Making Progress

So, it's been quite a while since I last posted here at Compete Life. Almost 7 months to be exact. Many things have transpired. Much time has passed. Perspectives have evolved. Since the passing of Brandon Klein, I discovered a lot about myself. I've realized that I am greatly flawed. I am selfish. I am stubborn. I am resilient. And I am a survivor. You see, in an effort to stay as transparent as one can on a blog, I've gone from living in a beautiful 3800 sq. ft. home to living on a great friend's (@ksparq08 for all you Twitter fans) couch. Over the past two years, I've gotten a huge slice of humble pie. And believe me, even though it doesn't taste good, it's extremely healthy! I was once a highly sought after producer in the Christian music market. Now I am completely unemployed and praying for God's guidance in how I will meet my monthly responsibilities on the horizon.That's quite a drastic and humbling change, both financially and emotionally, but the valuable lesson that I've been learning is how to truly rely on the Lord's guidance in the smallest of areas. That's something that never occurred to me as little as 4-5 years ago. I was selfish and self-absorbed!
As some of you know that have visited this blog in the past, I decided to take up the sport of triathlon and chronicle my exploits in training and competing. Little did I know that the training aspect of this activity would become so important and vital to my development both physically and, more importantly, spiritually. You see, being out alone on the streets or in the water, has become my prayer closet. It's the place that the Lord speaks to me the loudest and most clearly. And it's in this time that I can truly converse back to him audibly. It's my time with Him. It's OUR time together to sort through my "things."

In one of my recent daily devotions it said, "Anytime you try to make progress, there WILL be opposition. But with God on your side, you can stand your ground." With that being said, this past week was one of serious opposition. Satan knew exactly where to poke, prod, and test me. I cut ties with a very close friend of almost a decade because our relationship had become more adverse than friendly, one of my best friend's child was diagnosed with Muscular Dystrophy, I lost my job, and I have to go back to court for family reasons. It's been quite a week with a ton of painful build-up! That may be one of the reasons why I'm chronicling this - because it's a much needed outlet to get this stuff off of my chest and somehow make sense of all that's rumbling around in my head. That takes me back to my devotion. This has been my opposition and yet I'm choosing to stand my ground. Because unlike times before, I now more than ever know that God is on my side standing right behind me to support me and to remind me that He knows what the final outcome is and He knows who it benefits. I find peace and comfort in that.

Will this be a blog that keeps record of some forty-something year old man trying to stay in shape for some cheesy races? NO! Will it be an every day account of what's going on in my life? Absolutely not! I'm too private and reclusive for that. However, this WILL be a place where I will occasionally write my thoughts and epiphanies every once in a while. If no one sees or cares, fine. If they do, I hope you enjoy. Until next time, I ask and covet your prayers that the Lord truly guides me to where He wants me to be.

Stay active and enjoy life. You only get one!

Cold Weather Saturday

As I sit here and write this blog, I'm simultaneously watching the Triathlon Ironman Championships in Hawaii. It's unbelievable! Some amazing stories of perseverence and courage. It certainly makes me feel thankful for the many blessings that I have rather than focusing on my many trials. Watching this makes me want to train harder because of seeing some of these athletes and the adversity that they have to overcome. It's amazing the stories! It's life changing. It's spiritual. And it's a taxing process that you put your body through to see what its limits are. To me, it's a mirror to life and what the Lord allows us to endure in order to sharpen us and make us stronger. That's the thing I love about training and competing in triathlons and that's what continues to help me get through this rough period in my life. Even in the struggles, I thank God that He has a much bigger plan and knows the outcome to my life. He's not finished with me yet and I want to be ready.

The Glasses Half Full

This morning Troy and I went on our weekly 40 miler and the morning couldn't have been more beautiful. It was almost as if the Lord said, "here, have an incredible morning on me." That's exactly what we did. We had an incredible morning! As usual, we talked about a plethora of topics that was stimulating and spiritual all at the same time. It was great.

As Troy mentioned in the video, there's some good news hovering in the camp but we're not ready to divulge it just yet. It's certainly news that's powerful enough to help me out of my somewhat desperate situation. Let's just say, God is good and faithful. I'm feeling empowered. Troy's feeling strong and empowered and I'm sure the devil is feeling threatened. That's when we've got to be the most on the lookout.

It's a new day and a new beginning. Thank you to a dear friend for helping me realize that.

Thank you to Shelby for the accidental "borrowing" of the fashion glasses. :-)

Today's Update from Troy

Well, we DID get the ride in today around 3:30. How about this? We tried a variation of a mid-distance route and it was PERFECT! 18 miles and we did it in 1 hr and 1 minute (and that included a TON of stops behind a school bus). The weather was perfect. It was low 70’s and crystal clear with a nice breeze blowing. Todd and I had a very nice and enjoyable ride. I feel like we have our best talks about Jesus and what He is doing in our lives on days like this. It seems that when we get “deep” on stuff, that the moments fly by and the miles just rack up and it’s over before you know it. I’ll tell you, my brother is an AMAZING creation. The stuff that cripples us mere mortals is stuff that he just sails right through. For example, I don’t think he’s aware that steep hills are difficult on a bike and that slowing down is a natural occurrence. Oh well, be that as it may, I DO feel his pushing me has improved me greatly both physically AND spiritually (which is more important anyway – and we would BOTH say so without hesitating). I never dreamed that when we made ourselves accountable to each other back in April that we would be this transformed in so many ways 5 months later. God is steering our collective ship. I absolutely LOVE the view from His “boat” too! Give it a try if you haven’t gotten on board yet.

Talking With God

I'll just say that a lot is going on in my life right now that's not necessarily a good. God is definitely allowing me to be put to the test in many areas and He's continuing to speak to me through this training journey that I'm on. I've never actually experienced something like this where I find myself having a spiritual experience through physical exertion, but this has consistently been the case. And the more I train, the more God reveals himself to me in different ways.

He's certainly speaking to me in my life right now, particularly through my various family members - my brother being the main one. This is a trying time and the Lord has chosen to really get my attention through my training. It's my personal "special" time with Him and we talk openly. Sometimes good. . . sometimes bad, but always honestly.

I've learned through training for triathlon that it is as much mental and spiritual as it is physical. Maybe more so.